You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
we should paint friendship bongs
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
