Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
