and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
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