Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
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