it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
