i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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