He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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