Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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