? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
