A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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