Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I have peed in a lot of sinks
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize