Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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