So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
