Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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