Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize
