I need help removing her.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
