Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize