hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
