Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize