she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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