in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
