i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
