It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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