Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
