how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize