problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
It's official drugs can't kill me
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
