I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
