apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
there is puke in my bra ... again
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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