if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
