do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
