i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Randomize