He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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