mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
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