Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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