Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize