Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
