i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Let's get the cat blown out
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize