I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I'm having to shit out rocks
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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