I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
