like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize