I only kidnapped one of them. chill
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
