At least make sure they are 18
Why
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize