I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
And then he peed in my hair
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