I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
