i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
