the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
