I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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