I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
