she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
