I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
