he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
did i walk over a car last night?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
BRING THE BAGELS
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
