Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
